Silence
by Queen-Of-Sins
Summary: Brennan sits at Booths bedside.


_Okay, so I thought I would give it a go at something a little deeper and a little more angsty; mainly because I have not done one for Bones yet. No dialogue, well some but not proper. Dedicated to Danielle one of my great friends whose uncle has been given a short amount of time to live. Babe, I'm here for you and as I've told you thousands of times I will never judge the way you are coping. It's amazing what you are doing and this is dedicated to your situation, especially since you told me you liked it lol. _

**Silence**

She sat there, in the dark, as she had done for the past few weeks. She didn't sleep and she didn't feel the need to eat. Afterall, what was the point in eating if you were not hungry? She just sat in silence.

No movement, no tears, no music playing the background, no flicking and turning of book pages. Just silence.

It was a dark silence though one that loomed heavily over a person and piece by piece chipped away at ones inner-most thoughts and feelings. A silence where a person could be left alone with their own mind, unaware that by doing so they were destroying themselves as a person. She was stuck between a rock and a hard place and she felt as though she could see the light to set her free but it was just out of reach. The one thing that would keep her safe and secure seemed to be so close and yet so far away and she knew if she took that one step she would grasp it but that one step was an unthinkable task in the eyes of someone who wanted to play it right to the rules she knew.

Friends and co-workers, who happened to be one of the same, had tried to look after her. Made her food, brought her small tokens to make her smile and stayed awake with her while she sat.

In silence. Night after night after night.

Everything she knew, everything she had worked for, brought her no hope in a time that she needed it most. She knew every bone in a persons body and she had an high IQ but none of that helped her now. Facts and figures and written documents of the same situation molded themselves into her mind and became every fibre of her being, when she did speak, which seemed to be a rare occasion, it would be of countless other times that someone had found themselves in the same place and the ratios of the outcome being what they all wanted.

Her arms folded and she protected herself from the cool breeze that found solace in the room, that she sat, through the open window. The air was thick on her skin but a refreshing change from the enviroment she had built around herself.

He had promised he would always be there, whispered to her he wouldnt leave and told her to stop worrying but he had broken that promise. He was there, sure in body, but in mind he was somewhere else. Somewhere she couldn't speak to him, somewhere where her fears would be realised but he couldn't hold her and tell her it would be okay, somewhere far away from where she was holding out for him.

In his hospital bed he would just lie there, in an oblivious coma and injected with a form of morphine and other medications she knew about but didn't want to dwell on. It had been two weeks since the incident, two weeks since she had slept and two weeks since her whole life came to a screeching halt as she watched her partner fall to the floor from a gunshot wound to his body. He had been beaten and shot by some serial killer who then took another bullet to the back of his throat, killing himself quickly, taking the easy way out.

Two weeks since she had closed her eyes for more than a minute because everytime she did she saw his face as he lay on the floor. Two weeks since she had listened properly because she was still replaying the sounds of him in her mind. Two weeks since she had seen the sparkle in his brown eyes.

Everybody else seemed to have given up. Reassuring smiles and sympathetic hugs were all the rage in the hospital room where Booth lay, but she wasn't ready for that. No, she wanted to hold out until the bitter end. They all knew he was an egotistical moron and he wouldn't let something like a bullet and a few kicks to the body take him away from his son and the life he loved so much. He was just lazy, she told herself, he's just lazy and that's why he wouldn't open his eyes.

That was it. That was the reason. She was a rational person but this situation took all the strength she had and she wanted him so badly to prove to her that indeed there was a God and he was going to save him. She wanted all his nonsense talk of the Holy Ghost and the devil and God and whatever else he rambled about to be true just so she could see his smile or hear his voice.

It was amazing the power your mind had over your body when the room was completely silent. You could think about things that usually, in a normal enviroment, you couldn't think about because you had things to do or people to talk to.

Usually for her it was things to do. Until he came into her life and forced her out into the bright and harsh place others took for granted. The world outside of anthropology books or long words or phrases which received blank faces and approval which said "Wow, she's smart." rather than "That's what I want to be like." But he showed her more than that, he showed her that she could mix things and experiment and go to the edge of boundaries to take that small step over them and to feel the rush of adrenaline along with the sting of excitement. She was just too afraid to admit it to herself that he had helped her in more ways than one and he saved her from herself.

She cared for him a lot, more than that, it was an intense feeling. A spark of sexual tension and the crackle of intimacy not yet achieved, but in a way she wanted it to remain that way. Maybe not forever but just for now would do quite alright. It gave them the fire to solve the cases, the chance to speak out and shout at one another, the flare to admit defeat and to know when you have won and the ability to be comfortable with who they were. It was suggested she loved him by Angela one night over a steaming cup of hospital coffee in a polystyrene cup and she had agreed to that. She did love him, as a friend and a partner, but it was just a comfortable love. There were sparks obviously, but after Sully and Booth with Cam, work relationships were out of bounds.

Of course Angela and Jack had made it and she admired them for that, but her and Booth had a different type of relationship to that, whilst Jack and Angela grew on one another and developed slowly with caution and perspective, her and Booth were more of a physical relationship. They found one another attractive from the start and feelings may have developed but the way they worked and the close proximity they were usually in added to that, and she figured, it was because of the attraction she felt that everyone perceived it as love rather than admiration.

And she knew the difference between the two. She admired and respected Booth in everything that he did, albeit she didn't always agree with him, his way never let him down so far. Even now, laid in his hospital bed wired up to machines, it wasn't his fault. The suspect had been trapped and had taken it out on Booth, there was no motive and Booth had done nothing to him it was a freak event that she now wished had happened to her rather than him.

A physical pain was easier to deal with than an emotional pain. Physically you can heal, scars can fade and bruises can disappear but emotional pain was different. It manifested itself deep within you and rose it's ugly head when you least expected it. It was one that never left but shaped you into a person, one that you could forgive for having but never forget.

Brennan heard the door open and turned to see Angela's shadow in the frame the two women shared a smile and she collected her bag and her coat and stood up, looking down at Booth who was oblivious to the turmoil he was wreaking by, for once, not being able to speak. She smiled at the thought of his reaction if she told him her thoughts about him wreaking havoc with his opinions, or hers for that matter, and placed a kiss on his forehead promising to come back tomorrow.

She left the silence to open arms and left her private hell back in the hospital room.

_And I'm finished. Review please._


End file.
